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According to the book, The Artist Way at Work, Riding the Dragon, Chapter 2, this is the week devoted to listening for The Roar of Awakening.
How not to get A-Way from work:
Answer email. Call colleagues. Check email. Snorkle the web. Poke through the news. J.D. Salinger died today, who knew he was still alive? Check out the new iPad. Steven Jobs is definitely still alive. Clean desk. Hold fast to the delusion that you’re busy, racing against the clock, catching up and making up for lost time. . .at work.
Reporting in on “time-out,” I observe that work deprivation can be a form of torture for the workaholic.
Tough times, tough town. January in Detroit. However sunny and clear the day, it is bone chilling cold. Here in what feels like the epicenter of the Great Recession, “time out” for all too many friends and close colleagues means time out of work. I have not been cut from the workforce, but the blade feels ever so close.
Home today, I couldn’t be busier at work, my desk piled with books to read, proposals to write, new projects in development - all engaging and challenging enough to keep me occupied. Gainfully employed. And yet, becalmed in this sea of work, my time is my own today, on a “Furlough Day,” an imposed day off without pay.
Furlough. Isn’t that the word for temporary leave of absence from the army or from a prison term? Furlough. In Detroit that’s shorthand for lay low, wait and see how the next quarter will go. Furlough. Let’s share the wealth in reverse. Better news than Lay Off, if everyone sacrifices just a day off, we’ll all get through. Isn’t that the spirit of non-profit?
Ok, boohoo, so I feel like a polar bear swimming in open water. With a day off of my choosing every pay period, I have all kinds of time for Time-Outs to plan. Or not. The day awaits, the wind blows fresh and clear, there’s still a good hour and a half before the sun dwindles, and my resolve fades. Still time for a Starbuck’s and a curl-up with a good book. ( reading The Maytrees, Annie Dillard).
Up in the Air. Oh yeah, I’ve seen it.
Sleeping like a blog. . .waking way early these days. Any normal person might ask why. Why get out of bed long before daylight on a perfectly good Saturday morning to scribble in a notebook that no one will read? Why indeed . . . noting that I actually turned up the lights at 4 am on Saturday morning and 5:00 am on Sunday. Unintentionally. It just happened that way, as my mind started wandering out of sleep and spinning dayward to work. Nothing unusual in that, even on a weekend. Work is always on my mind on one level or another.
As a scribbler of words, ever on “assignment” in advertising for nearly 25 years in Cleveland, then in the stretch to PR and fundraising for the Jewish Federation of Metro Detroit, and now as an exhibit designer/content developer for the Detroit Science Center, my work has always been a form of creativity, a source of energy and discovery. And so, I’m well accustomed to wakeful rest and restful awakening.
I suppose if I were better organized, I’d keep a notebook at bedside, near the shower, while driving, walking, exercising. . .but what a bother and what a menace on the road, hunting for a pen. And so I have come to trust those ideas that knock gently, let themselves in, and stay where I choose to keep them, content to be “on the back burner” or ready to jump into the stew up font.
Do I have a “book” of my own simmering somewhere? Not really. Not that I know, and not that I will ever find by standing on the sidelines of writing for others.
Why here, why now? A brief introduction: For those on this road who don’t already know -- Annie is a former colleague of mine. Actually, more than that. Ann and I met one another first as “Shaker moms” -- family friends, some time before she joined Liggett-Stashower. Our sons have been close friends since junior high. We have shared big chunks of our lives together. It may have been Ann who introduced Morning Pages to me, I don’t recall, but I do remember the giddy venture we started at Liggett-Stashower with Lynn Lilly and Rip Ruhlman and others more than a decade ago, embarking on “The Artist Way at Work,” just before I moved from Cleveland to Detroit.
Why now? Why again? Because my dear friend Ann has generously asked me to join her. Because I’ve discovered it’s more fun to say yes than no to most ventures in life. Because for the time being, the time being right now, I have given myself the assignment of opening up to “The Way” again, this time at the instigation of Ann (the only real and serious writer I know) and in the company of good friends from Liggett-- Maura, Laura and Marilyn -- and others whom I hope to meet soon. I hope to take this journey with you as seriously as Ann does, and to do the work as conscientiously as I would any other “paid” assignment.
That in a nutshell is my reason for being here -- rolling out of bed, shaking off sleep, awakening to Morning Pages . . . and blogging (of all things)finding my way again . . . reading, writing, noodling. . .who knows where it will go. See ya'll on the path. -V
The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.
No! That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you’ll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!
Drafting on the wheels of Ann’s metaphor, yes, I can relate to Toad Head mornings, bleary-eyed, cold-blooded, and amphibian-brained, fighting to get up for the task at hand.
Longhand? On three pages? Every morning. 84 mornings in a row? You must be kidding.
Surprise, surprise: if you don't allow the Toad to wake up, it never shows up. What follows is a suggestion, not a prescription - a framework that seems to work for me - or so I think.
1. Each night: leave your pen parked on the empty page of your notebook, poised and waiting for your return in the morning. Turn off the lights. Get some sleep.
2. Before daybreak, 5:30 am - long before the alarm in your head goes off, beat the Toad Clock, roll out of bed. Follow your feet to your desktop, your workspace, your blank page. (Okay, you can stop to pee, but that’s it. No splash of water on your face, no taste of toothpaste, no jolt of caffeine.) Blast the light on, sit down and pick up your pen. Don’t think as you apply ink to paper.
3. The first line. Just throw it out there. Eyes don’t need to be focused, and t’s don’t need be crossed. You’ll see. In pre-conscious dawn, the fog will lift.
4. At the first glint of day, keep the pen moving, a steady, even hand on the page. You'll notice: how the wheels start spinning when you let your WriteBrain think for you. Don’t stop, don’t read, don’t edit, don’t make curlicue sentences. Do nothing but get down to the groundwork on paper, filling the page, moving forward, word for word, line for line, until you reach the finish. And there it is, 25 minutes – 30 minutes max. Done. Close your notebook. Are you awake? You bet you are. Focused, alert, energized, you are braced against the day, and open to its possibilities.
Like stretching tight muscles, like breathing in the practice of yoga, like reps in weight training, like building up a sweat on a bike, longhand freehand writing doesn’t just work the brain, it works the body. And just like any exercise, it only gets better with . . . exercise.
Thank you, thank you Ann. For opening the road and inviting us to come along. For the exercise. All good things will come of it.
-V